How many sessions will we need?

The average number of sessions can range from 10 to 20, but this varies from couple to couple, and person to person. For some couples 10 joint sessions may be enough to feel like they’ve made good progress. Others may wish to continue much longer and work on deeper layers of conflict.

At the end of the day, it’s up to you and your partner to decide when you feel happy with your progress as a couple and ready to finish up counselling. You’re always welcome back if new challenges arise that you need support with. What you’re aiming for, when it comes to terminating therapy, is to feel that you and your partner together have a new understanding of your relationship, that you can both articulate future dreams and goals for the relationship, and are that you both are able to name one circumstance where you would re-establish counselling.

How long are counselling sessions?

Sessions are 60 minutes long.

Is coupes counselling covered by Medicare?

There is no Medicare rebate available for couples counselling.

I’ve never had counselling before and I feel a little nervous, what happens in a typical session?

It’s absolutely normal to feel a little uncertain about counselling, Natalie will help you feel safe, supported and comfortable. Counselling is about developing trust with your counsellor so that you’re able to talk about issues that may be very personal and extremely difficult to discuss.

In your first session, Natalie will make space for both of you to talk about your current challenges in the relationship. She will ask questions to clarify and summarise your immediate issues and goals for therapy. Natalie will also start to give you insight into the dynamics that are operating between you. 

After the initial session, Natalie will arrange to see each of you for an individual session to talk about your individual family histories.

If Natalie feels it’s not appropriate to move forward with couples therapy at this stage she will let you both know and, if appropriate, provide you with other options to move forward.

If it’s appropriate to move forward, your sessions will then focus on resolving your relationship issues by identifying how each of you can become triggered and stuck in a negative fighting loop. Couples therapy aims at increasing your knowledge and awareness of yourself, your partner and the patterns of interaction between you.

Many people come to therapy believing their partners have the most to learn. Most of us find it tough to be self-reflective and admit our faults. We all find it even harder to change ourselves, rather than imagine all the wonderful ways our partners could change. However, to make couples counselling work for you, the most important thing you can do is begin to consider how you can change to make your partner feel safe. Therapy becomes effective as you develop an awareness about your negative patterns, learn to interrupt them and communicate in new ways with each other.

Is it recommended that partners also receive individual sessions?

In some circumstances individual counselling can be incredibly beneficial. If Natalie identifies that this would be appropriate for you or your partner she will make a referral to another counsellor for these sessions. Natalie will collaborate with your individual therapist to ensure that counselling approaches are always working in the best interest of both individuals and the overall relationship.

Does Natalie offer individual counselling sessions?

Yes. While the majority of Natalie’s work is with couples, she does also offer individual counselling.

Our relationship isn't completely broken. Is counselling still a good idea for us?

Certainly – a relationship doesn’t need to be broken to benefit from greater understanding and awareness. Learning ways to manage conflict and be open and vulnerable with each other will help you build a stronger relationship. Undertaking counselling before a crisis happens is the best thing you can do to future proof your relationship. It will help you feel more confident to deal with challenges when they hit (as they inevitably do), have a deeper understanding about your relationship and how to approach sensitive topics together.

Does Natalie offer therapy online and is it as effective as face-to-face counselling?

Yes, Natalie offers sessions online and this can be just as effective as face-to-face.

Will Natalie take one partner's side over the other?

Natalie is qualified and trained to help couples in a balanced and non-judgmental manner while prioritising your relationship. She will remain neutral during your therapy sessions and help you to develop a deeper understanding of each other’s experiences in the relationship.

Will we talk about sex during our counselling sessions?

Natalie will ask about your sexual relationship and satisfaction. It’s absolutely up to you to decide whether this is an area you would like to explore and discuss. Natalie will check in with you to make sure you’re comfortable talking about sex. While you may not feel comfortable discussing your sexual relationship it’s important to know that dissatisfaction and issues around sex can sometimes create tensions and feelings of resentment in other parts of your relationship. Natalie will help you navigate this sensitive topic, and others, with care. 

My partner says they’re sure they want to end our relationship. Can relationship counselling still help us?

In short, yes.

Sometimes one partner can feel so stressed and exhausted that they have no more energy to work on their relationship. If they also feel that their partner has no desire to make a change, then they may be left feeling that they just don’t have it in them to keep trying. However, most people understand that ending a relationship isn’t a quick or easy solution. It can have huge negative effects on members of the family, as well as financial, personal and social disadvantages. 

In almost every relationship there are good aspects which most couples would like to preserve, even if there are also problematic parts that need to be resolved. Natalie offers a way to see the potential. 

If, in the worst case scenario, there aren’t sufficient changes for either individual to feel they want to continue with the relationship, counselling can help you to navigate your separation. And you will each know that you have done everything you could to save your relationship before making that decision.

Can I come on my own without my partner?

Yes. If you prefer to get some confidential help or advice as an individual, Natalie can help. The dynamics within a relationship can change when even just one half of the couple develops greater insight and awareness. If you’re unsure of what you want to do in your relationship, Natalie can help you sort through and clarify what you want and need and discuss what options available to you. Alternatively, if you’re sure you want to separate from your partner, Natalie can help you in making this transition as painless as possible.

I feel like relationship counselling can help but my partner isn't convinced. How can I get my partner involved?

Natalie suggests you come on your own first. If you bring home strategies that help your situation, your partner may be encouraged to join you in counselling. Even if that doesn’t happen, there are many insights and strategies Natalie can help you develop that will assist you with your issues. One person making positive changes can alter the dynamic of a relationship. You have the power to change your relationship by working first on yourself.

What happens if we start sessions but we feel Natalie isn’t the right counsellor for us?

It’s important that you feel comfortable with your therapist, your relationship is not something to be taken lightly. Natalie understands that finding a therapist you feel safe with and supported by is key. If you decide that she isn’t the right counsellor for you, Natalie will happily make a referral or help you find a more suitable therapist.

What if I cancel the appointment?

Life is complex, Natalie absolutely understands that cancellations or postponements sometimes happen. If you cancel or make a change to your appointment with at least 24 hours notice no fees will be charged. If you cancel or make a change within 24 hours of your appointment you will need to pay the full cost of the session as we will be unable to offer the spot to others.